Not So Empty Nest Syndrome

here's where this story ends

2010-09-14T08:08:00.000-04:00

when asked in a job interview shortly after starting this online place (back when blogging was kind of new and perhaps not quite a verb) about what i thought it represented, i said at the time that my intention was to chronicle the ups and downs, the laughs and struggles of raising a blended 4 then eventually a family with 6 kids after we were lucky enough to have the twins arrive. i said to the older execs who didn't quite understand the whys of this new online world, 'wouldn't it be nice to read about what your parents or if the blog survived even longer, your grandparents were up to day to day, what they were like, what they were thinking about.' an online diary to or scrapbook to look back on and smile remembering a special holiday or event or something as simple as a little boy jumping off a diving board for the first time. a little over two years ago, our family hit a speed bump that rippled outward and inward eventually tearing apart what we tried to create when we first met over ten years ago. so this is the end of this blog - i think this is a good time to close the book on this chapter of my life here and move on to somewhere new if i feel like sharing stories of the new life, the new love, the new family. i was a certain way here and i am no longer that person for better or worse.

i suppose we all imagine that our lives will go a certain way, and when that end point that you dream and hope and plan for is gone, it's kind of hard to reconfigure. i read recently that being separated is like treading water and that's an accurate description of what your life is like - a kind of limbo for a while until you can get your bearings again and figure out how to swim again. you really get the sense some times that you're not winning this game called life. it's tough. but you have events that keeps you grounded; that you can measure your life struggles against like the death of a family member and having your best friend battle breast cancer. so i'm taking my time and rebuilding slowly. i'm adding pieces back to my life that i truly want and i'm learning to develop new routines and bringing into focus some new dreams and nurturing a new love so that it will be strong enough to weather the storms life throws at you. someone to go scuba diving with when we're 75.

i got my gold sealed copy of the divorce papers in the mail yesterday. i guess the gold seal makes it special somehow. i guess it tells me to just keep swimming just keep swimming.

Good Feeling Gone

2010-07-08T05:05:00.001-04:00

like something out of a Six Pence None The Richer song

2010-06-15T23:48:00.002-04:00

do we wish we had the last 11 years back? to do it differently? or perhaps not at all

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YcNzHOBmk8

today I found thought-to-be-lost digital pictures from 2001 to 2006

2010-04-14T21:57:00.001-04:00

and as 20,000 pictures imported into iphoto, you get to watch 10 years of your life go by in 10 minutes in an insanely fast slideshow of easter egg belly, spider monkey finger baby, old apartment, 9/11, rocket nursery, our do-it-yourself wedding, cozumel honeymoon, birthday parties, summer fun, grandparents, new house, new pet, hayride, new baby, Halloween, diapers, blizzard, camping, face paint, DC, sippie cups, carousels, school events, surgery, drool, shrek, vacations, disney, skee ball, beaches, washington, fishing, deer, cougars, ferries, friends, birthdays, lacrosse, new york, dictionary, preschool, sandbox, skateboard, new preemie nephew, survivor, pool, siblings, summer parties, forks fourth, swimming, driftwood, hottub, salmon, pelicans, ducks, both mighty and fuzzy, Boston Rob, scenes of italy, venice pigeons, lollipops, candles on cake, tank engine, san francisco, golf, bet it's a boy wins new tv, peeing oustide wins new shoes, clinic soccer, karate, 5 am easter, playtime, myrtle beach aquarium, fuzzy beach pics, mexico, christening, toys, boys, girls, blues clues, grandma, potty training, buzz cuts, shaggy hair, kissing brothers, ikea, bald spot, too small wetsuit, too small karate outfit, tutu and tights, chuck e cheese, the zoo, the stadiums, field trips, pony rides, cows, goats, pumpkins, baseball games, play-doh, sledgehammers, old kitchen, new kitchen, new bathroom, ebay, old bay, owen's pictures of floors and ceilings and his eye, baby shower, blocks, car seats, paint the nursery, guinea pig, twins on their way, waiting room, little hands, pretty dresses, onesies, blue eyes, knitted pants, cloth diapers, babies on bellies, babies grabbing toes, sprinklers, diving boards, bowling party, lincoln logs, christmas, team alioto, sitting up, pig tails, chihuahua, knit skirt, crawling, science project, standing up, walking, running, talking, singing, smiling, laughing, scooters, trikes, bike riding and a lifetime of memories.

What Is Inside You?

2010-03-23T13:24:00.001-04:00

I find myself asking myself that question a lot these days.

Proud Parent

2010-03-11T14:52:00.000-05:00

"Morgan has been instructed never to bring her “Lucky Talisman” to school again. The “Lucky Talisman” is apparently a dehydrated frog she had as a pet several years ago. Please reinforce with Morgan that she should not be bringing any type of pet (living or dead) to school, and make sure that she leaves her frog at home."

signed Morgan's exasperated teacher.

2010-02-27T07:22:00.002-05:00

I am going to start dancing like the guy at 1:07

2010-02-15T16:10:00.000-05:00

who just happens to be Fred "Rerun" Berry from What's Happening!!

tu es très mignon

2010-02-09T14:45:00.000-05:00

heard this morning

2010-01-20T09:31:00.000-05:00

The universe will expand, then it will collapse back on itself, then will expand again. It will repeat this process forever. What you don’t you know is that when the universe expands again, everything will be as it is now. Whatever mistakes you make this time around, you will live through on your next pass. Every mistake you make, you will live through again, & again, forever. So my advice to you is to get it right this time around. Because this time is all you have.

Bored

2010-01-13T13:37:00.000-05:00

so I registered the domain name www.squirrellsinmypants.com and I need to figure out what to do over there. There's a video up for the time being

New Year

2010-01-06T14:59:00.000-05:00

Time for some brand new thoughts, new looks, new feelings and new ideas. Out with the old and in with the shiny and new.

He's Home!!!

2009-12-30T06:38:00.002-05:00

If you were hoping for a Hollywood ending to this story like we were, you're in luck. I got an email around 6:30 last night from someone only a few blocks from here who thought that she knew someone who got a puppy a few days before Christmas that matched Max's description from the news, but she wasn't certain it was him. She asked if we could meet so that I could verify it was Max and I agreed. I was hopeful and excited but started to tell myself that it probably wasn't him and that I shouldn't get my hopes up. We met about 45 minutes later (it only seemed like hours) and as soon as they pulled a dog carrier out of their car, I saw Max Weenie's distinctive white and brown chest colorings and I started nodding my head when she asked if I thought it was him. We freed him from the little dog carrier and let him run around - he was very skittish, but soon settled back into the house and grabbed his favorite chew toys out of his dog bed and my slippers and started playing. I can't begin to express how happy the kids and I are that he's back. Thank you for emailing and calling and stopping by wishing us luck in recovering the smallest member of our family.

Hoping for a Christmas Miracle

2009-12-24T17:41:00.002-05:00

UPDATE: MAX RETURNED 12/29!!! ~~Lost/Stolen Puppy~~

Answers to Max or Max Weenie - please email me.

House in Baltimore City was burglarized 12/23 and our 6 pound, 4 month old male puppy was taken as well as Christmas presents.

Please email if you have any information.

Enhance This

2009-12-18T17:56:00.000-05:00

Your 2009 Leprechauns

2009-11-21T16:08:00.003-05:00

These 6 gutsy kids from the mean streets of Baltimore took on the undefeated team from St. Ursula. We were under-manned by 2, but these underdogs didn't know the meaning of the word quit today. They put up a fierce fight with no substitutions against 14 kids on an unbeaten squad and came up just a bit shy of victory today... I was very proud to be their coach today.

I want a doctor to take your picture so I can look at you from inside as well

2009-10-13T08:09:00.000-04:00

this morning's x-rays still show a slight left to right fade which is perfect for a golf ball trajectory, but sucks if it's your spinal column. scheduled an mri for tomorrow morning to see if there's a break...

Vast - Touched

2009-09-24T01:49:00.000-04:00

6!

2009-09-16T06:00:00.000-04:00

I like icebergs

2009-09-03T05:11:00.000-04:00

I also like anthropomorphic glaciers

pain pain go away come back another day

2009-07-14T06:05:00.001-04:00

i wake up nauseated and hope the pain is not as bad as yesterday. i turn off the alarm which missed another opportunity to wake me and pull a pillow in tight and rock gently. waiting for it to get better.

"That's What She Said"

2009-06-29T19:54:00.003-04:00

This is my favorite teacher note since this one.

Reason for detention: another student made the comment "you need to push it in further" (innocent comment) and Dalton added "that's what she said"

Highlight of this past week: Simon got carsick

2009-06-06T22:01:00.002-04:00

Falling In Love In a Coffee Shop

2009-05-28T23:09:00.002-04:00

Owen Interview Part 1

2009-05-19T07:51:00.000-04:00

A few minutes with Owen

2009-05-19T07:09:00.000-04:00

I can't for the life of me

2009-05-18T07:21:00.003-04:00

figure out what Owen wants. He keeps saying he wants a bat snake on a CD, but honestly I don't think he even knows what a CD is. His brothers are asking me to help them burn a music CD. Googling batsnake comes up with these images.

Gary "BabaBooey" Dell'Abate completely blows Mets first pitch

2009-05-11T06:38:00.002-04:00

Shadow Boxing

2009-04-05T23:12:00.002-04:00

In the middle of running errands and chauffeuring athletes, bibliophiles and snake lovers around, I was reminded of one of the simple joys of childhood. Ethan was bobbing and weaving in the parking lot looking down and punching at his shadow, then mine and his brother's. Justin joined in and for a moment I looked down and thought of how many hundreds of times I had punched and stomped on my own shadow, too. I may have thrown a punch today.

Got Milk?

2009-04-03T07:10:00.000-04:00

Watched 'Milk' last night and it just didn't have that feel-good Hollywood ending I was looking for. Kind of a bummer actually. Sean Penn was really good in it. They should give an Oscar or something.

Daddy Goes To School

2009-03-27T21:35:00.000-04:00

Owen, remember that day I went to your school and had 14 Blackberry's in all the pockets of my cargo pants and a laptop half-tucked into my boxers? I'm glad you're back today - we enjoyed visiting with your alter-ego, Jack from Jupiter, but it's nice to have my boy home again. And yes, I remember that you hate school and school sucks.

We're Not Raising Free Range Kids

2009-03-16T19:45:00.000-04:00

No worries - Owen puts them back in their cages whenever they escape.

No Comprendo

2009-03-12T22:03:00.003-04:00

The boys were being particularly shitty tonight for no apparent reason other than it was a day that ended with a Y. Bedtime was no different with Owen teasing both twins and making them cry so I put him to bed with the warning that "...I want better behavior from you tomorrow, do you understand me?"
"I understand evryfing," he shot back snottily "Evryfing butcept Spanish talking!"

Spring Forward? Screw That!

2009-03-09T07:51:00.003-04:00

me: Owen, it's time to wake up and get ready for school.

With eyes closed, 2 fingers get raised in a peace sign.

"I just need 2 more hours, Dad."

Who wants some "chocolate" milk?

2009-02-28T09:23:00.001-05:00

What's the Buzz?

2009-02-24T06:04:00.001-05:00

Morgan & me around 10 years ago

Our Lady of Fatima 1980-81

2009-02-17T19:21:00.001-05:00

Biology & Bad Hair

2009-02-16T22:19:00.001-05:00

Brent Keith

Our Lady of Fatima 1978-79

2009-02-16T21:54:00.003-05:00

The Greatest Birth Control Advertisement ever

2009-02-12T20:34:00.001-05:00

Bad Dreams

2009-02-06T06:18:00.000-05:00

Owen shuffles into our bedroom at 2:30 mumbling about a bad dream. We send him back to bed. At 6:30 I wake him up and ask him how he slept.
"Fine." That's usually his first response followed by a long silence and a heavy sigh.
Over cereal a few minutes later, he manages to tell me that he had a "weird dream" and that I got eaten by aliens but he couldn't save me.
Justin, detecting that his brother is upset, pushes him over the edge with, "Owen! Are you crying?!"
"NO! My eyes are sweaty!"

Is there anything the internet can’t do?

2009-02-01T08:16:00.001-05:00

Welcome to PMSBuddy.com!

PMSBuddy.com is a free service created with a single goal in mind: to keep you aware of when your wife, girlfriend, mother, sister, daughter, or any other women in your life are closing in on "that time of the month" - when things can get intense for what may seem to be no reason at all.

For women, this is a great way to give people in your life a heads-up of when you might be feeling a bit irritable without having an awkward conversation.

What's more, we will not only keep you informed, but will give you some free advice on what to do about it. With PMSBuddy.com, there is no reason to ever be blindsided by PMS again.

PMSBuddy.com - Saving relationships, one month at a time!

“Growing Up In Briarcliffe” by Bob Wigo

2009-01-31T12:07:00.002-05:00

I imagine there are those from outside the area who might overhear the mention of “growing up in Briarcliffe” and envision an upscale neighborhood comprised of stately single homes replete with swimming pools and tennis courts. For those of us who grew up in that wonderful enclave in Delaware County that notion would certainly raise a smile for we know that our Briarcliffe was something very different than the images of the upper middle class environs the name may suggest.

Briarcliffe was, and is, a huge collection of brick row homes constructed circa 1950 on land bordered to the north by Providence Road ( I know guys, that’s a stretch ) to the east by Oak Avenue ( although some purists may say Ashland Avenue), to the south by Academy Avenue (sorry, not MacDade Boulevard) and to the west by neighborhood streets winding along the eastern perimeter of Our Lady of Fatima Church and School’s property. There are a few intricacies as to how the actual geography measures up against the perceived borders but for brevity’s sake I hope you will agree this outline will suffice. Our mailing addresses said “Glenolden 19036”. We never did. Home was Briarcliffe.

As World War II vets and their young families sought a patch of ground to call their own, neighborhoods like Briarcliffe and it’s twin sister a few miles to the north, Westbrook Park, were sprouting from the ground. Three bedrooms, one bath, a garage, and a postage stamp of green grass in front and back. Row upon row of solid brick boxes.In 1950 the going price stood between nine and eleven thousand dollars. Thousands of newlyweds and young families scuffled up enough cash to get themselves in the door and a neighborhood was born. And what a neighborhood!

Memories abound. The best and most succinct recollection came from an old friend when asked of his best Briarcliffe memory. “Kids, kids and more kids, doing everything together.” Briarcliffe was a neighborhood in every sense of the word. The Moms were full time Moms. Every Mom knew every kid and every kid had a good idea that there were always more than one set of eyes watching over him or her. We answered to them all. We spent our days in and out of front doors for cold drinks and peanut butter sandwiches wedged between heated contests of wireball, wallball, stepball, halfball, boxball, rundown, capture, muckle and countless other games of skill or chance. Baseball cards were flipped and pennies were pitched. We played basketball “on the wires” that ran across the back of our houses. Garage doors provided the backdrop for wiffleball games. We built miniature golf courses in our back yards. One quick glance out the front door and a guy knew there was plenty cooking and he better hit the front step running. There was always room for one more. The neighborhood simply buzzed all day long with the raw energy of hundreds of kids living life as fully as our little slice of heaven would allow.

There were ball fields and basketball courts. Bikes to ride. Sprinklers to run through. The girls were jumping double- dutch or playing hopscotch with a wary eye out for the approach of their tormenters There was always a Dad in the bunch, having volunteered to manage a little league squad, that had a bag full of baseball equipment in the garage. Full days would be spent at Westbridge or Rively playing pitcher’s hand. Evenings were for games closer to home with the folks up on the patio looking on. Angelo’s Water Ice truck created a mad scramble at every turn as we hustled home in hopes of landing just one more quarter toward the evening’s treat. Paradise curbside. Water ice , a soft pretzel and smiles all the way around.

Early on there was a pharmacy with fountain sodas and penny candy. Wynn’s Market handled our milk and Tastykake requirements and Joe’s Hardware kept a close eye on their pimple ball inventory. The dark and mysterious Cedarwood Tavern spilled it’s air conditioning out onto the sidewalk as we strained to catch a glimpse of the patrons . Briarcliffe Swim Club, for those of us fortunate enough to enjoy membership, was only a short walk from home. It was our oasis from Memorial Day through Labor Day, our escape from those sweltering summer days before even the luckiest among us knew of window units or could even imagine central air. We cooled down in the crystal clear pool, played basketball, pitched horseshoes and saw girls in bathing suits for the very first time. We walked home through the cemetery and pretended we were cool.

Walking among the swarms of kids were many wonderful adults who recognized the potential of this enormous energy and the need to provide a place for us to play and learn the valuable lessons of competition. The Briarcliffe Father and Son Athletic Association was born of the hard work and dedication of a group of men and women with a vision for the future of our little corner of the planet. Fields were manicured, courts were paved and painted, teams were organized, leagues were formed, coaches coached and parents cheered as their children enjoyed the spoils of the enormous effort that created, and maintains to this day, one of the finest youth organizations to be found anywhere. The opening day parade through the streets of our town was the official greeting of Spring and all the joy and fun in store. We marched in our uniforms, the Larks, the Robins, the Eagles, carrying our gloves, waving to the folks lining the streets while the firetrucks blasted their air horns. They made us the stars of the show for that one day and we drank it up. If the world had any problems they never visited Briarcliffe on the day of the parade. Everyone of us who were blessed to participate in all the “Father and Son” offered owes an enormous debt of gratitude to the men and women who have given so freely of their time and energy. Our organization became the cornerstone of our community and remains so to this day. I can not imagine life in Briarcliffe without it. Several of the founders are still involved nearly fifty years later. People like that are special and should be appreciated. They made a difference in thousands of lives. Thank them when you see them, for all of us.

The neighborhood spawned a diverse cross section of personalities. From those humble brick rows were born doctors, lawyers, educators, musicians, athletes and authors.. There are innumerable success stories. There, of course, is a darker side as well.. The same drugs that invaded our urban centers through the sixties and seventies found their way to our friends and neighbors. Heroin has sadly claimed a dozen or so of our own over the years. The peripheral effects of those same drugs paid their house calls to most of us. There was theft, family troubles, an isolated but clearly distinguished gang mentality within a small portion of the youth community and just a hint of danger that hung in the air from time to time. Often a fight would be announced and we would join the crowd. Somebody had something to settle and they were going to do it for all to see. We cheered or winced as our buddy gave one out or took one square on. There were some car wrecks, “guy’s been drinking”, some people got banged up pretty bad. This was our world and it moved fast. We acknowledged our difficulties and embraced all we were capable of embracing and moved through the troubled times. Families helped families. People pulled together. Kids just kept right on being kids and Briarcliffe, through the energy of its children and the dedication of its parents, kept up its collective chin and maintained her status as a great place to grow up.

We forged lifelong friendships there. Guys with nicknames like Geeter , Turk, Bake , Cone and Crec’. There was Brocks, Wils, Juhls and Dutch, Marco and Raz.I remember Smiley, Breeze, Bags, Beast and Bones. The list is as long as those rows of red brick. Many of us spent eight years together at Our Lady of Fatima. Some of us went to Darby Township public schools. We were all from Briarcliffe. For those of us that attended OLF together the bond just got stronger as the years passed. We played football and basketball for our school. Won some. Lost some. There were holiday tournaments and track meets. Our calendars were booked.

When any two of us are together we inevitably stumble upon a name that had escaped us for a long time and the laughter erupts as all the good feelings of being a kid there wash over us. We lost some of those friends and mourned together. Some of our children have been taken far too soon and we hold each other up during those saddest of times. Some of us married the girl next door. We come from a place that nearly demands we stay in touch, get together, celebrate. Long spells without contact are broken by hearty greetings and a resumption of conversation that seems may have paused just moments ago. There is so much common ground , so many shared components of our lives. We went to school together, we played together, we competed with and against each other, we experienced our first kisses in the back alleys there, we snuck our first smokes down by the “crick” and cracked our first beers together in our parents basements. We heard our first live music together and danced our first dances with Briarcliffe girls. We lived there. Really lived there. And that living is celebrated every time two or more of us get together. I have always been proud of our capacity to celebrate each other. There is an inherent connection between us all, men and women, that insists on being acknowledged.

As a kid I considered myself the luckiest of the lucky. Great parents who knew the value of their love for their family and valued our love in return, wonderful siblings each and every one, abundant laughter and neighbors who took their roles to heart. I even considered living on Briarcliffe Road a bonus. In my young mind, the flagship of the neighborhood. Each and every day growing up in Briarcliffe was a gift from friends that knew about friendship from the ground up. We were born into those friendships and they were us. To this day meeting an old friend from the neighborhood is one of life’s wonderful pleasures. We joke, the conversation soaked with the sarcasm that has become our trademark. We laugh loud and hearty. We run down some of those strange nicknames and we laugh some more..Kevin Arnold would have fit in pretty well but Wayne, he would have thrived. Briarcliffe runs right through the center of all of us.

Briarcliffe remains a vibrant community to this day. The “Father and Son” remains a mainstay in the experience of the youth of the neighborhood and many who enjoyed that organization thirty and forty years ago now work diligently to ensure that same experience for the youth of Briarcliffe’s present. The swim club still bustles on sultry summer afternoons.Our church stands tall atop the hill where we raced our sleds on snowy winter evenings. Many, many of the boys and girls we grew up with are now the men and women who returned to Briarcliffe to raise their own families and recreate the magic of their youths for their children. If they can manage to capture just a small portion of their own childhoods there they will provide for their children a great foundation and a connection to which they can always turn for the comfort of home. And the kids will probably pick up a pretty good nickname along the way!

I can not pass on this opportunity to say thanks to all the friends and families that made our neighborhood so very special. To all the crazy characters that made me laugh so hard You know who you are. And a special thanks to you Mom and Dad for a job so perfectly done and for putting us all right where we knew we should be. Long live Briarcliffe and all of the wonderful people that make it the place I will always call home.

Bob Wigo

Rwigo@aol.com

Run

2009-01-20T06:31:00.001-05:00

Why It Pays To Travel First Class

2009-01-17T08:36:00.001-05:00

18 degrees

2009-01-15T23:10:00.002-05:00

Our front porch is unusually empty and seems much bigger then normal. I lean on the cold stucco column looking out over the city and the moon as it rises above it. It's cold out. And quiet. Hardly any traffic and no sirens. Nobody is yelling. Smoke rises silently from the houses across the street and the city lights below us twinkle in cold clarity. The moon is red-orange and looks like God cut off the top third out of boredom.

Star Wars: Retold (by someone who hasn't seen it)

2009-01-15T06:18:00.000-05:00

Star Wars: Retold (by someone who hasn't seen it) from Joe Nicolosi on Vimeo.

First Day of Recycling in a few weeks

2009-01-10T21:17:00.003-05:00

This picture does not do justice to the room we had filled top to bottom with cardboard boxes from Christmas. I felt the need to document my effort in breaking down what felt like an Amazon.com warehouse.

Simon's New Best Friend

2009-01-09T06:12:00.002-05:00

A duet

Reading Goodnight Moon to the "BUHD"

He's very gentle when Chicken is on his shoulder

He doesn't even mind it when the bird messes with his ear

Simon: A Primer

2009-01-02T17:41:00.005-05:00

If you come in contact with the alien life form known as Simon, I would like to provide a translation guide to facilitate communications. If you find yourself engaged in conversation with this entity, it will be similar to the scene in Dances With Wolves where Kevin Costner and Kicking Bird are trading 'Tatankas' and 'Buffaloes' back and forth.
Simon: aby acogga
You: A B a cocka?
Simon: mo baby uh-KA-guh
You: I have no idea what you're talking about.
If you're lucky, Sabrina or Owen is in earshot and can translate that Simon wants to listen to Baby Beluga again.
This concludes lesson 1 in Simonese.

Nipple Hair Moustache

2008-12-23T15:46:00.000-05:00

I Done Did It Again

2008-12-22T08:42:00.001-05:00

Fantasy Football champion 2 years running. I'm a one man dynasty.

All My Extra Testosterone Is Finally Fashionable

2008-12-17T06:53:00.002-05:00

"Ever since Adam caught Eve checking out that snake, men have spent way too much time worrying about the appearance of their manhood. What’s more important, the size of the wave or the motion of the ocean? Well, I’m here to make a bunch of men more neurotic by telling you the answer is none of the above. As far as I’m concerned, the real signifier of masculinity lies in another area entirely: chest hair. And it’s making a comeback."

Read the rest here.

Fantasy Football Playoffs

2008-12-16T06:51:00.004-05:00

My scrappy Heat Misers have once again battled from the bottom of the regular season standings two weeks in a row to get to the finals next week. A repeat of last year? We shall see. Unless you're wearing an eye patch and you have no depth perception.

Owen Can't See

2008-12-15T06:22:00.000-05:00

Upon waking up, Owen (who sleeps with his eyes half open in a fully lit bedroom) says to me, "Dad, I can't see a fing. I'm totally blind."
I told him that his eyes were adjusting to the light as he was waking up while I carried his limp, half-blind carcass downstairs.
When I turned on the living room lights to roughly the brightness of 3 candles, he said, "that's way too bright! Are you trying to wreck my eyes?"

OMG WTF LOL

2008-12-09T12:59:00.000-05:00

Meet Elizabeth (Lizzy) Frisinger 18, isn’t she precious? She is also mind blowingly stupid. Elizabeth, a Senior in Cleveland went on a class trip where she lost her virginity on the beach. Apparently it was “gr8″.

We know this because young Lizzy was so excited about her conquest she immediately texted her friend, except it wasn’t her friend.

Lizzy accidentally texted her dad.

This May Be In Our Dining Room Right Now

2008-12-09T07:15:00.000-05:00

Check me out

2008-12-06T22:05:00.002-05:00

I finished another book. Smashed: Story of a Drunken Girlhood by Koren Zailckas. I read it during bathroom visits while I plow through Lonesome Dove and the story of her love, struggle and dependency on alcohol I found very compelling.

This Brings Me Great Joy

2008-12-03T05:43:00.001-05:00

Sugar Glider, aka the Pocket Pet

2008-11-29T07:30:00.006-05:00

I have to face the facts. My friend at work, Chris is never going to give me a monkey. Despite the fact I gave him a blazing fast computer and ginormous flat panel monitor. Not that I'm bitter, but seriously, a deal's a deal, buddy. He's a very nice guy, but he's either looking out for my best interest or the monkey's and guess I'm ok with that. Yesterday at the Festival of Trees, I stumbled across a booth that sold what appeared to be a real live pikachu, only not so yellow. It's related to the tasmanian devil which is a trait we desire in a pet in our household. I guess it's more like a 6 inch, 6 ounce flying squirrel that you can have perch on your shoulder and nestle in your pockets, hence the clever marketing name, Pocket Pet. I would have gone with Pants Opossum, but that's just me. I wonder how many of these baby wombats the guy in the official looking Discovery Channel shirt sold.

6 Years Ago

2008-11-23T08:52:00.003-05:00

I was scrambling to find and pack 3 sets of kids dress shoes and a marriage license. We were surrounded by our family, friends and children celebrating the start of our lives together. The service was simple and intimate, the cake was perfect - peanut butter and chocolate and the evening flew by all too quickly to adequately spend quality time with all of our loved ones. As it turns out, these six years with three kids together have also gone by in what seems like the blink of an eye.

I'm really ready for this year to be over

2008-11-22T19:30:00.002-05:00

Mercifully, there's only 39 days left until we can close the books on the leading contender for the suckiest year on record.

Turn Your Head and Cough, Mr. Babar

2008-11-19T21:58:00.000-05:00

Breaking Dawn

2008-11-16T14:29:00.004-05:00

I finished the series. 4 long books with lots of pages. Hardback novels. That's 5 since July which exceed my previous record of 5 non-computer, non Bathroom Reader books read in a year by 5, I believe.

The upside to all this reading? I'm not watching as much TV and hence I am happier according to this study.

COLLEGE PARK, Md. - A new study by sociologists at the University of Maryland concludes that unhappy people watch more TV, while people who describe themselves as "very happy" spend more time reading and socializing. The study appears in the December issue of the journal Social Indicators Research.

I want to know who is funding these studies and are they watching Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew on VH1? I defy you to watch a few minutes of Gary Busey or Jeff Conaway in this show and tell me you're not happy with your life.

Which Way is She Turning?

2008-11-15T22:36:00.002-05:00

Please comment with your answer.

Happy Anniversary

2008-11-13T21:23:00.003-05:00

There's nothing like an embarrassing photo to send well wishes to loved ones.

Goodbye, Old Friend

2008-11-10T16:15:00.000-05:00

Popcorn, Owen? Om Nom Mom Nom

2008-11-09T18:51:00.002-05:00

Owen is munching on some microwave popcorn with kernels all over his shirt so I say, "Owen loooves popcorn!"
"Yes! It's my favorite thing in the whole wide world. I love it more than apples!"
"Even more than pickles," he continues, "definitely more than pickles!"

From the book, Cuddle Sutra

2008-11-09T14:28:00.002-05:00

Watch This Video and Dream of Baby Pygmy Hippos

2008-11-08T19:54:00.000-05:00

John Williams is the man

2008-11-08T06:17:00.000-05:00

How Cool Will This Kid Be In 20 Years

2008-11-05T20:24:00.002-05:00

"I'm Thtuck!"

2008-11-05T06:15:00.001-05:00

"Daddy, I want a squirrel. Get me one of those squirrels. I want one!"

2008-11-05T06:00:00.000-05:00

I have a running joke at work with one of our scientists that whenever I provide IT service to his group, he will give me a monkey*. A few days ago I came across this article describing one kid's experience ordering a pet monkey from an ad in the back of a comic book. Click the title for a link to the full article. Enjoy.

Tuthill told POP!, “I know it wasn’t over $25 bucks because I wouldn’t have bought it if it was. I remember I saved up the money to buy it, and I had it delivered to a friend’s house that lived around the block from me. He called me up when it was delivered, and there was actually postage due upon delivery, which I expected. It was less than ten bucks. I was 15 years old. When he called, I rode over on my bike. It came in this little cardboard box. I mean, I’m saying small. It was probably the size of a shoebox, except it was higher. It had a little chicken wire screen window in it. There was a cut out. All you could see if you looked in there was his face. I brought it home, and I actually snuck it into the basement of the house. We had a basement entrance door, a regular opening door that opened onto the stairs going to the basement, and I snuck it down. I remember distinctly my father had his brother and his wife over, and they were entertaining upstairs. And I snuck it in, and my friend came along, because he was curious to see what this thing looked like. Now, the basement in my parents’ house was separated by, half of it was finished off, and the other half — ‘finished off’ being paneled walls and a drop ceiling — and the other half, where the furnace was, was untouched, basically, so you had all the plumbing up above on the ceiling. Now, when I was a kid, I had a menagerie of animals. That’s why I actually had Dutch toy rabbits and gerbils and all that stuff. I had the rabbit down in the basement, so I brought the monkey down to the basement and I put him into a cage, a rabbit hutch, basically, that opened from the top. I put the whole box inside the cage and then opened the box up. He jumped out. Now, instead of having a collar, because you’d strangle it, it had a belt. It basically had a collar around its waist.”

Tuthill continued, “No instructions [were included]. He had this waist belt on, a collar, if you will, on his waist, with an unattached leash inside the box. So I opened the box up inside the cage, the monkey jumped out, I withdrew the box and found the leash. I have no idea where it came from; I assumed it came from Florida. I figured, well, it’s probably near dehydration, so I opened up the cage to put some water in it. It leapt out of the cage when I opened it up the second time! I mean, it was eyeing the pipes that I was unaware of. As soon as I opened the cage, it leapt up and grabbed onto the plumbing up on the ceiling and started using them like monkey bars, and he was just shooting along in the basement, chirping pretty loud. It was heading towards the finished side of the basement, where there was a drop ceiling, and if it got into those channels, I never would have got it. It would have been days to get this thing out of there. I grabbed it by its tail, and it came down on, starting literally up by my shoulder, like a drill press it landed on my arm, and every bite was breaking flesh. It was literally like an unsewing machine. It was literally unsewing my arm coming down, and I was pouring blood. I grabbed it by its neck with both my wrists, threw it back in the cage. It’s screaming like a scalded cat. I’m pouring blood. My friend’s laughing uncontrollably, and my father finally comes in the basement door and goes, ‘Jeffery! What are you doing to that rabbit?’ And I go, ‘It’s not a rabbit, it’s a monkey, and it just bit the hell out of me.’ ‘A monkey? Bring it up here!’ I’m pouring, I wrapped a t-shirt around my arm to stave off the bleeding, carried the cage upstairs, and I don’t know why I bothered sneaking it in, because they fell in love with it, and it was like, there was no problem at all. They took me to the emergency room and I got 28 stitches on my arm.” The young comic reader learned the hard way to never grab a monkey by the tail.

* I do not believe I will actually get a monkey.

Obama Won

2008-11-05T00:20:00.000-05:00

Finished!!!!!1

2008-10-31T06:15:00.000-04:00

Today At The Farm Field Trip

2008-10-30T22:56:00.003-04:00

Owen says he rode a cow. I think he meant a horse. Poor dim bulb doesn't know the difference, I'm afraid.

Happy Brithday, Mom!

2008-10-27T15:20:00.001-04:00

Reasons I Grew A Beard

2008-10-21T20:41:00.002-04:00

Let's see if we can't get something posted here tonight, hmmm?

2008-10-21T19:57:00.000-04:00

Happy Anniversary

2008-10-16T06:57:00.000-04:00

Hundreds of thousands of dollars wasted and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.

Beach Pics

2008-10-12T23:23:00.000-04:00

Done!

2008-10-12T23:11:00.000-04:00

Whaddya think?

Acrylic on canvas 16" x 13.5"

Oh, The Huge Manatee

2008-10-12T07:33:00.000-04:00

Manatee just a wee bit north of his Florida home waters... Cape Cod. Who wants a lobster tail with a side of 'tee?

Another Year Older

2008-10-11T20:21:00.002-04:00

The October parent birthday month kicks off today and I want to wish my father a happy and remind him that the Chicago Cubs' last World Series appearance was the day before he was born. Not that he's a Cubs fan, just that he's really old.

Separated At Birth?

2008-10-07T22:04:00.003-04:00

A Million Little Pieces author James Frey and yours truly:

What I'm Working On

2008-10-06T22:21:00.003-04:00

first and second night's progress on my Dewey Beach painting.
Acrylic on canvas.

Begun These Clone Wars Have

2008-10-04T09:55:00.004-04:00

A commercial plays on the Cartoon Network for the new show called Clone Wars, a part of the Star Wars universe which Owen loves.
"Owen, The Clone Wars start tomorrow."
Wide eyed, he shakes his head quickly, "For real?"
"Well, the TV show starts tomorrow. The real Clone Wars are a ways off, I think."
"Oh, good."

I can just see him now with his lightsaber ready and other arm out for balance declaring, "A-pare to be languished!" which is crazy for prepare to be vanquished.

Governor, I served with Maverick

2008-10-02T22:25:00.002-04:00

I knew Maverick; Maverick was a friend of mine. Governor, you're no Maverick.

Teach Your Children Well

2008-09-28T09:27:00.001-04:00

Teach Your Children Well Part II

2008-09-28T09:23:00.001-04:00

He May Be Gone, But His Salad Dressing Will Live Forever

2008-09-27T21:22:00.001-04:00

What was your favorite Paul Newman movie? The Sting? The Hustler? Butch Cassidy? The Verdict, Hud, Cool Hand Luke? Mine is Cars, of course. I've seen it 72 times.

Ain't No Party Like A Politcal Party

2008-09-27T18:20:00.001-04:00

The Dress That Says I'd Marry You All Over Again

2008-09-27T16:27:00.002-04:00

Mayday. Mayday. I'm on fire. I repeat I'm on fire

2008-09-26T20:53:00.003-04:00

Rock and Roll Turtle

2008-09-26T20:52:00.001-04:00

5 Years Ago

2008-09-16T22:29:00.004-04:00

you came into the world with a different name than we originally planned. Calvin Douglas was close, but Owen Christopher was perfect. It has meaning to both your mother and me. We brought you home in a hurricane which seems to have marked you. The eye of your storm is serene and beautiful, but any moment Justin can set you off and you're screaming like a Category 5 storm. You love t entertain us and you have a quirky sense of humor. The things you hold dear are your trophy, your treasure chest, your pet rocks, tort, tortie and light sabers. You love to draw and told me tonight that you love almost everyone in the house then you corrected yourself and told me what you thought I wanted to hear - that you loved everyone in the house.

5 Years Old Today

2008-09-16T06:15:00.000-04:00

Chihuaroo

2008-09-15T06:39:00.001-04:00

Is it wrong that I wouldn't mind if Rufus lost his two front legs so that he can hop around like a little mexican kangaroo?

Bubbisms

2008-09-13T21:36:00.004-04:00

Sarah after a few beers while getting her hair dyed by Yvette:

You can touch my sebaceous cyst.
What's a sebaceous cyst?
A non-ganglion cyst. I like saying ganglion. My doctor said it's not a subcutaneous cyst.

Something funny appeared in Bubb's head.
Then Sarah spit out her beer on herself, Debbi and the rug.
"Don't worry - it'll dry!"
"I'm getting into character."
What character?
"I don't know!"

It was a mousse product, not a physical moose.
It was the color of mousse. (Hands up fingers spread like antlers)

On coloring her hair: It pees on my head.